Being Sporty Spice

I don't know when it happened, but I have embraced this new persona. I am sporty Jenn. I prefer to be in baggy exercise clothes, fully sweaty from a couple of good workouts rather than prim and proper and makeuped and shiny. I embrace this - I love it, I feel good about it. I like challenging myself, pushing myself. I like being a doer. I have been a doer for a long time, but hadn't pushed that into the realm of exercise. It started Fall of 06, and it's gotten worse (better) since then. Extreme exercise! Maybe several hours per day, 5-7 days a week. Rock on. Now my regiment is 2 hours of Kung Fu Mon and Wednesdays, Tuesday and Thursday I swim for an hour, then do 1 other exercise - usually running or another Kung Fu class. Then weekends - tennis, biking, running, hiking. Tried Cardio Tennis last weekend - hard, sweaty, fun. So seriously. And it's not a "hobby", more like an obsession. I'm an addict. I need to exercise. I don't back down or flake out or stop if I get sick (unless I'm really sick). But the thing is, when do you say when? I keep pushing myself, and surprising myself with how much I can do. I impress myself actually! This semester I do 2 hours of exercise each week day instead of just bricks on weekends for triathlon training. Push myself, and I can do it! However, you keep uping the bar, up and up. Well, I am learning a lesson - it's not ALWAYS good to keep pushing up, to keep challenging. It's HARD! And it's not always good for your exhausted body. Especially when you don't get enough sleep - my friend told me that for every hour of exercise per day you should add an extra hour of sleep on top of what you normally should get. Holy cow - what a time committment! So, I have to learn some restraint. And not doing 2 high intensity exercises back to back in the evening after not having eaten for 6 or so hours is probably WISE. Plus, you can't never give yourself a break. But when you keep uping, it's hard to ever lessen - it's like admitting weakness or defeat. Plus, then your body gets used to burning that many calories - your metabolism is different. So yeah - I'm learning. I'm trying to keep it in perspective. But I like this sporty life. But - definitely make sure you forgive your body some too - keep granola bars around! Still learning balance :-). Just because you can push yourself doesn't always mean that you should!

In other news, the boy said the other day that I am very comfortable with myself, that he likes that. Made me smile. It's part of becoming the best me, becoming who I really want to be. Being all I ever wanted to be, and maybe more. Impressing myself - being proud of myself! Some people made some comments to me about how I was in Jamaica, and that's the first time I think I felt it - like I was radiating. So together, so happy, so confident. Comfortable in my own skin. And knowing myself - knowing what I want. Part of it then (and now) is showing off my new body. It does make me confident in appearance. But it's also like I'm unstoppable. I believe I can do anything, anything I want to. And I'm doing awesome stuff for myself, doing what I love and what is good for me as a person. Being happy. So yes, comfortable with myself. I like that feeling. I have lapses, for sure. I doubt, I feel bad about myself sometimes. And sometimes I get scared about knowing what I want (or lack thereof). It's not easy. But on the whole, I'm on the path. Woohoo!

Texas has been a pretty exciting place to be lately. I voted, I even caucased! I was proud for the caucusing. I was there for like an hour and 40 minutes waiting outside - waiting to have my vote counted a 2nd time. Very weird system. But I like the energy, I like that everyone is excited, hopeful, involved. I'm a little sad she won Texas, but we shall see. Crazy close! Yay for being part of the democracy and having my vote count!

OK, that is all. I hear tomorrow about my paper getting into the conference or not - wish me luck!